What NOT to Say When a Woman Gets Her Special Monthly Visitor

“Don’t worry. In a few years you’ll have dried up and it won’t be a problem anymore.”

“You have one every month. Shouldn’t you be used to the pain by now?”

“It’s better than the alternative, right?”

“Well, that explains things.”

 

On the flip side, the following comments are perfectly acceptable:

“Hi, honey. I happened to be at the store during lunchtime and they had your favorite chocolate on sale. Here’s a case of it.”

“I’m so happy to see you! I was just thinking, ‘I haven’t made dinner in a while.’ How about you go take a nice, hot shower for a few hours and I’ll take care of dinner and cleanup.”

“Hi, sweetie. I have great news for you: I just read about this surgery they can do to remove a woman’s uterus and place it inside her husband -but only during that time of the month. I signed us up for today; let’s go!”

4 thoughts on “What NOT to Say When a Woman Gets Her Special Monthly Visitor

  1. This blog sure made me laugh! I can’t say I have ever heard anyone tell me that I’d be dried up in a few years, (how rude!) but, I have heard all the other comments in the NOT category. And nope, I never had a man tell me all those wonderful “fantasy” comments which would actually indicate they understood how miserable women feel each month. I think only men in novels written by women are sensitive to our cramps. Isn’t it funny how men gripe and complain about mostly everything (a man with a cold is always on death’s door while a woman is working or caring for children and just walking around with a box of Kleenex.) Nope, men don’t get it unless we tell them.

    I will say, that since I am now of an age where I no longer get my monthly period, I am quite happy about that. It is one of the few joys of aging. (We have to embrace what is awesome.) I suffered terribly for years. I started at 12 and continued well into my 50’s. So, by the time I finally hit menopause I didn’t mind the hot flashes. (Well, yeah I did, but they were so much better than getting a period. UGH!!!)

    Nobody can tell you how to feel. And nobody should ever tell you that you will dry up. Didn’t, actress, Betty Davis say “Getting old isn’t for sissies!?” People get old and everyone changes, but comparing that to miserable pain, cramping, tears, break outs etc. is just plain cruel. While I find it is great to be in my 60’s, I won’t tell you to enjoy being young because you get your period. Enjoy being your age because youth IS pretty awesome and you can do a lot more when your body still cooperates. But that old monthly curse is just that. A real pain. And I hated it. So I do a snoopy dance thinking about how I love not having it any more. Yay!!! But, I have to admit, if I could go back to my 40’s with the wisdom I have now, I’d take that in a second, even with my monthly.

    My suggestion is to put a note on the Fridge each month….. ” I need chocolate, time to myself, and for everyone but me to make dinner for the next three- five days.” It gets the message across. I learned to just post on the Fridge…or you can just text now a days – (There was no texting when I was dealing with it). BUT, Let your demands be known. And hopefully the family will get it. I had two sons so being the only girl in the house, my boys never wanted to discuss this subject with me. They’d order in chinese, pizza and whatever, and leave me the heck alone. They knew better!!! (The Best way ever to handle it when your kids get a little older.) Start now training your hubby. LOL Of course I’ve been divorced twice so the men in my life knew not to tick me off…. Just sayin’ (That’s how ornery I became each month.) I am so much calmer now. Sigh…. Keep writing…. Love your blogs.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, Lesley! 🙂 I fabricated the suggested comments one should make, but am afraid the first four did not go through a similar embellishment.
      Perhaps we’ll finally get around to the take-out and chocolate waiting for me each month. It sounds lovely! ❤

      Like

  2. Oh like #3 of the ‘acceptables’ will ever happen! As big of babies as men are when they’re sick? Girl, please!

    My mom once asked her doctor what menopause actually was and he replied, “How would I know? I’ve never been through it.” To which mom replied, “You’ve never had a baby either, but I bet you’d tell me all about that.”

    Liked by 1 person

    • 😀 Ha, ha! So true! I remember being pregnant with my first and wanting so badly to know What REALLY to Expect When You’re Expecting. 🙂 It’s one of those things you just have to go through to know.

      Like

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