I’m pretty sure my computer is out to get me -and not in any of the obvious, open ways others’ do. It’s my computer, after all.
For example, this morning it wouldn’t load. It sat behind a completely black screen. Smirking. Right before the point at which I was planning on smacking the keyboard against my head in a furious fit of rage -it displayed a message: Cannot load user profile.
Okay, I thought, You wanna play that way? We’ll restart. My hand reached for the power button.
*Bing* Up popped my Windows account, good as ever.
Oh good. I’ve shown it who’s boss. I opened Chrome.
It’s still loading.
And that is why this post was written on my phone.