The Weekly Terrible Poetry Contest

Well; hi, there! Do you like to poem? Yes? No?

Either way, you’re in the right place. This here’s The Weekly Terrible Poetry Contest. We’ve been in business for 26 weeks. Check out the somewhat informative post on terrible poeting for some tips and tricks, then read this week’s specifics:

  1. Topic: Engineering fails. You can write a lament dedicated to an actual, catastrophic, historic fail; or limerick about a fanciful one.
  2. Keep the Length between 9 and 199 words.
  3. Rhyming is purely optional, but intentional misuse is always a great way to destroy a potentially great poem.
  4. Most of all, write terribly! I want the engineers studying failures throughout history to read over your creation, shake their heads, and unanimously declare your poem to be the worst disaster the world has ever experienced.
  5. Keep the wording at a G-rating, for the impressionable members of the research team.

You have till 8:00 a.m. MST next Friday (May 24) to submit a poem.

If you wish a week’s worth of anonymity, use the form. Leave me a comment saying that you did as well, so we are sure it was submitted.

To be more social, include your poem or a link to it in the comments.

Whatever you do, have fun!

amogh-manjunath-773461-unsplash.jpg

Photo credit:
Amogh Manjunath

34 thoughts on “The Weekly Terrible Poetry Contest

  1. A fanciful one? I guess I will be very, very fanciful… and so a limerick. A very bad limerick.

    They once built a bridge to a star
    Oh, that’s so incredibly far
    But relativity it seems
    Is more than bad dreams
    So the warped space time continuum over the light years, uhm, yeah, uhm, made it hard to reach by car?
    yeah, that’s it, made it hard to reach by car.

    OK, a second one 😉

    I once built a bridge, that is true
    One to reach from me over to you
    But my skill was too weak
    So it fell in the creek
    And now I’m terribly blue

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Thou wert my gate

    Thou wert my gate
    in the fence of life;
    a doorway in the
    corridor of existence;
    a hole in the
    wall of being

    Now you have shut the
    entrance to your heart
    and I am shattered into a pile of quaking reinforced concrete .
    No more will I hear your euphonious voice
    wafting over the plastic barrier of time;
    no more will my nostrils sense the scent
    of your hair on the yellow brick road of vivacity.
    Oh the audacity!

    You have become an engineering failure,
    a total engineering failure;
    in fact you are the biggest engineering failure
    I have ever encountered in my life.
    And you are fat.
    I wish you all the Botox you can lay your hands on.
    You need it.

    Strumpet! Strumpet!
    You have no reason to blow your own trumpet
    for thou art a total engineering failure!
    Thou wert my gate
    in the fence of life
    but now you are just a pile of rocks –
    to say nothing of your choice in tasteless frocks.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. First Thing’s First

    I built a
    Boat.
    At first it wouldn’t bark
    Then it wouldn’t hark
    To anything I said.
    It swam there, tarried there
    And drove me to Timbuktu
    When I wanted to go to Malibu.
    So I shot it
    In the hull
    And now the problem, I think, is solved.
    Glub, glub, glub.
    Oh dear. What whim.
    There’s only one thing for it: Can I swim?

    Liked by 2 people

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